Just the Two of Us

note: wrote this Mon. took 3 days to get back to the computer to hit the "post" button. life with just the two of us is full. wonderfully full. The world's greatest baby-holder, Grandpa Phil, is on his way today and Daddy returns home tomorrow.

Jude and I had our first mommy-son outing today. Being as I can only lift 10 lbs. for the next 3+ weeks (Jude tipped the scale at 9lbs. 2oz this morning), I can't say we embarked on a leisure trip, but rather a "business" endeavor back to the hospital for a hearing test. Even so, it was surprisingly successful and fun.
During our initial three day stay in the hospital Jude failed the hearing test in his right ear. Twice. Today was the earliest follow-up appointment they had. I hadn't thought too much about the hearing issue over the past couple weeks. Then this morning the questions came: What will this mean for Jude? Will he be teased? What if he always uses it as an excuse for not hearing me? :) Mark, as only Mark can, calmly reminded me that Jude is perfect no matter what, and that both my eyes are pretty lame, at least one of Jude's ears is perfectly fine. Yes, we have a healthy boy. We are blessed.
Unlike the last two tests, Jude slept "like a baby" while they placed the electrodes on his head and the little bulb in his ear. I, on the other hand, actually paid attention this time. I didn't watch the monitor screen, displaying ambiguous waves that could have been of an irregular heartbeat, an earthquake seismograph or the Social Security Administration's rank of baby name popularity through the years. No, I studied the doctor's face in the same way I had during our initial ultrasound. It's hard to read a face that you don't know, to decipher between fleeting twitches of the eye that indicate concern versus simple concentration at one's job. Losing at my own little game, I fixated instead on a small tutorial displayed on the wall about hearing aid options. Again, Mark was right (there you go babe, two accolades in one post); these aren't your grandfather's hearing aids. As quickly as I had started to envision future trips to the audiologist, and to truly be grateful for the entirety of Jude's health, the tech said enthusiastically, "My favorite baby of the day. Everything looks great!"
Though many things about motherhood have not come naturally to me, the neuroticism has. I triple check that the air-conditioning is turned to 69 degrees at night for fear of SIDs, I no longer talk on my phone while driving, I'm the mom who checks his breathing when I haven't heard his darling "squeek" in a while. He's changed me, but since it's a packaged-deal with such a such a great little boy, I'll take it.

Jude upon returning home from the audiologist. He slept through the entire excursion.