Staycation and the Cost of Raising Kids

Staycation 2014

You know how they say it costs precisely a gazillion dollars to raise a child through age 18?  I've sorta been wondering if that includes incidentals.  Like when unnamed child closed the garage door on our van a couple months back busting some springs in the door and requiring a repairman, did they count that?  Or second unnamed child dropping an ipod down the furnace vent or first unnamed child putting a penny in a friend's friend's car stereo causing a small electrical fire (sorry Jonelle and Aaron!).

We also owe Cave of the Winds in Colorado Springs approximately $4,250,000.  On the plus side, they don't know this.  We went on a lovely staycation yesterday as I don't plan on going anywhere legit for the rest of their childhood. (kidding, kidding)  Caves are sorta Jude's"thing", then again so is setting a lobster trap- can I get some help here? but we live in Colorado so a cave it was. Cave of the Winds tells you when you enter that the first rule is no touching the cave walls; you will be fined $2500. Tell that to a 2 years old.  I mean, we did tell that to a 2 year old, many times. The tour guide didn't specify how much running your hand along the wall costs so I just factored it in as 10 touches. It was pretty dark in there, hello Cave, which covered a multitude, actually all, of Luke's transgressions.

So back to my original question. Are these things included in our gazillion dollar total?  Because a gazillion dollars is understandable but a gazillion plus incidentals?  That's gonna cost us.